"I promise to try writing in full human, with less roboting(2)." -AGG
So, Gothgirl noticed some kind of behaviours some time ago (A year or two ago, don't remember), and wanted some issues to be addressed but unfortunately, there was no time to talk about it at the town hall (Some topics took more time). It was just stated to be "nice" with each other.
A good thing this robot decided to make a 101!(3)
Some years after, Gothgirl thinks it is a good idea to settle again the OOC chat Etiquette version AGG, because why not? It is always good to talk about the human in its biome!
OOC chat Etiquette 101?(4)
Well, it is supposed to be a kind of suggestion about how people may behave during certain situations. So that you don't get talked to like if you were a troll, when you ask for more details and say you don't understand. Or if there is any misunderstanding or something tricky happening, among others.
So what is this blabbering about?
Gothgirl would like to talk about some human stuff she learned from Woebot, mainly the "Defusing Technique" during heated situations. So, there will be a little story about Robot and Human, two workers having a heated talk.
Then we can make a little analysis on how to human the best ("Best" being relative though). Gothgirl loves analysis!
(Philosophical definition, of course.)
"[...]considers the human person as physical being, as knower, as responsible agent, as a person in relation to other people, to society, and to the end, or purpose, of human life." Source: A course on Philosophy.
Gothgirl understands it as that "Human has great responsibilities and may deaded(5)the World."
It seems, according to the Myers–Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Myers%E2%80%93Briggs_Type_Indicator), there are 16 types of personality. That means a wider set of human people with their own pros and cons. Some are chatty, others are not, some are into details, others are into the big picture... etc. Not all people on OOC are from the same country, which means different culture, different way to think and not everyone knows the lingo for every country. It makes a good study material. Human is an isle after all.
Gothgirl is not an expert on human stuff. Gothgirl just knows some of social stuff are so useless, but some humans just like it. Anyway, the point is, there is always a chance in divergence somewhere.
Because of that, there are some ways humans can behave to make things less dramatic.
Talking about dramatic stuff, humans are super prone to being dramatic. There are also those who are dramatic-less. It is more a brain stuff and, once you get self-awareness and mindfulness and self-introspection(6), it is easier to manage. Gothgirl also unlocked some self-awareness like 4 years ago, and since then she is more wary of her brain(s)(7) and the humans.
Gothgirl is going to talk about her favourite lesson. It has something to do with human relationship (Her not very favourite topic!).
We will start with "Empathy 101" which is the title of that lesson.
Long story short, a worker named Robot will be confronted by Human and learn something out of it.
*This is taken from Woebot's lessons who took it from a book called "Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy" from author "David D. Burns, M.D."
Robot: I was working at my desk when Human started yelling at me. Human was not very happy.
AGG: Tell me more.
Robot: Human said that I am the reason of its bad performance review, that I told the superior it is super difficult to work with. It also said It has kids and it can't afford to lose its position. It also told me that as a robot I have nothing to lose, and that I should get rusted.
AGG: It is terrible. What did you do next?
Robot: I am not responsible for its bad job performance, and I am a young robot, I don't want to get rusted!
AGG: I see. What did you say next?
Robot: I said "I am sorry to hear you had a bad job performance review. Being criticized of 'being super difficult to work with' can be very upsetting. I can imagine you are very angry. You seem to be a really caring parent, and you do care about the company. Maybe we can talk about it."
AGG: *eats popcorn and gets a glare from Robot* Sh...shorry. Pleashe contchinue.
Robot:*sighs* Well, it seemed calmed down, and we ended up having a constructive chat.
AGG: *nods* That is good.
Robot: I learned a lot from this human and it learned a lot from me.
There is a kind of communication 101 which may help in those situations.
You repeat back the words said by the confronting person. It is important to use the person's own words but, i.e. "I am sorry to hear you had a bad job performance review."
II-Identifying the person's feeling:
Always focus on how the other person is feeling, i.e. "I can imagine you are very angry."
Fun fact: It is not always easy for the humans to acknowledge that someone else is angry.
It has to be authentic and positive, and not sounding sarcastic, i.e. "You seem to be a really caring parent, and you do care about the company."
Humans are prone to listen if they are not feeling defensive. When you don't know what to say, showing them you want to make sure you hear them correctly is a positive thing which will help.
It is important to be authentic. Sharing vulnerabilities helps in showing it is OK to own feelings. Asking someone to tell more or to clarify helps in showing that you are interested.
The communication algorithm will sum up like this:
Rooted Empathy + Compliment+ Defuse + I feel... + Follow-up = Better Situation
This sums up the great article about humaning(8) better.
Gothgirl decided to share a little of her learning and hopes that it was very entertaining and educative.
(1) The author of the post.
(2) To robot means in this context, not to communicate fluently like humans.
(3) 101 is a way to ask more about something. Here, it means guide.
(4) 101 turns the sentence to "What is OOC chat Etiquette?"
(5) Deaded is some typo-ed word Gothgirl likes to use to say "destroy", "kill". You may have heard it during RP.
(6) They are state of mind which may make life less stressful, according to wellness apps.
(7) Brain(s): Let's keep it a mystery. Gothgirl is no zombie.
(8) Humans call it to be normal. Gothgirl thinks it is very relative.
This guide is a little help I can give on how to better communicate and avoid some annoying situations over the chat. It is supposed to address everyone so, I hope it can be a little light in the darkness.