If you could go back in time and change history, what would you change?
Hard to say. Maybe Id just redo my life, knowing what I know now.
Or maybe Id just win a few powerball tickets.
If a theme song played every time you entered a room, what would it be?
What one toy do you wish never existed?
Theres a pink flamingo that sings and shits a rainbow turd. To hell with the toy, I wish the person that made it never existed.
Which would be harder for you to give up: coffee or alcohol?
Currently trying to stay sober... coffeewould be much harder.
If you could go on a cross country road trip with famous person, dead or alive, who would it be?
Ooo. Dr Hunter S Thompson
Who would you hate to see naked?
Uhm... Hagrid, from Harry Potter.
Who is your favorite stand-up comedian? Why?
Tough call, I like a /lot/ of comedians.
If you were in the circus what kind of performer would you be? (Clown, tight-rope walker, etc)
Clown sounds fun - I cant imagine the job description being too strict - just do ridiculous shit and make people laugh.
Whats your favorite viral YouTube video?
Cyanide and Happiness.
What skills do you posses that could help you survive the zombie apocalypse?
I can build an explosive out of non dairy creamer.
What are two things you would do if you woke up to find yourself completely invisible?
Step One: Collect Underpants.
Step Two: ....
Step Three: Profit.
Would you go streaking across a football field during a game for a million dollars knowing theres a 50/50 chance youll get arrested for indecent exposure?
Yes. Whats the maximum sentance for that anyway? Even if you get 10 years in jail, youre still averaging 100k a year.
Describe your own personal hell.
Being surrounded by stupid people.
What fashion trend do you wish would go away?
If you could rid the world of one disease what would it be?
Salmonella. Medium rare chicken FTW
Would you become a professional bank robber if you knew you would never get caught?
Why stop at banks?
What is the strangest thing you've ever eaten?
Who is the most famous person you have ever met?
If you had to choose to live without one of your five senses, which one would you give up?
Whats something you always wanted to do as a child but never got to do it?
I was told I could be anything when I grew up. I wanted to be a Firetruck.